Tallahassee because instead of milk, you get creamers for your coffee [but this is the only respect Miami is like Tallahassee]

Las Vegas because they ply you with alcohol and their codependent relationship with tourists

Key West because scanty clad women are used as consumer bait

Washington, DC because there is day long traffic and when it’s humid it’s sincerely humid

San Diego because the beaches make the ocean sparkle and vice versa

New York City because of the art vibe and foodiness competition